So here’s a tale of two situations in which bully’s have recently impact in the life of my own family:

True Story 1:

One morning, my normally enthusiastic son woke up and decided that he didn’t want to go to school today. Why? Well, getting the answer out of him wasn’t very easy…

“Did something happen at school?” “No, Dad”

“Do you have a test today?” “No, Mom”

“I just don’t want to go to school - not today, not ever!”

After some initial probing, my wife and I were finally enlightened by our son, “There is a boy who picks on me at school, and I don’t like it.” Now, we were getting somewhere. Unfortunately, he didn’t know the boys name, but my wife was now on a mission to figure out just who this boy was.

“Is he in your class?” “No”

“Does he just seem to pick on you?” “No, Mom”

This was all my wife was going to get out of him this morning. So, as she drove our son to school, she supplied him with some anti bullying tactics. It just so happened, that it was my wife’s day to be the room Mom, where she helps our son’s teacher with whatever tasks need to be accomplished that day. So, my wife took the opportunity to discuss the situation with my son’s teacher. Our son’s teacher’s response was swift and immediate. “We have no tolerance for bullies. We will get to the bottom of this.”

My wife left feeling assured that her little boy was going to be safe- she had prepared our boy for how to deal with the bully himself, and also informed his teacher about the situation.  Later that afternoon, another parent was in the classroom, when our son’s teacher asked the class, “Is there anybody who is not nice to you at school?” Almost every hand was raised. The teacher called on one of the students. “Yes, his name is Jeremy” (name changed to protect the not so innocent) And so it was, it seems everybody in class has had some trouble with Jeremy. My son’s teacher immediately gave the kids an assignment, and then picked up the phone to call the classroom across the quad - and guess who she was calling? Jeremy’s teacher of course.

Now, I am not sure what happened to Jeremy - he is of course, still at school, but I can tell you this: it’s been 2 weeks since this came to our attention and our son has not complained about going to school (at least not anymore than any other child who hates getting up at 6:30 AM to go to school)

This was a simple bullying situation. Was my son adversely affected? No, but he was very upset. The key here, is that we gave him the tools to deal with bullying, but also, brought to light a situation that could have been developing into something that is much worse. Other children knew this boy was causing problems. Perhaps our son was more sensitive to it or he was a primary target of the bully, while other kids were secondary targets, I am not sure. What I am sure about, is that this bully situation is completely under control.

Now, not all bullying situations get resolved so neatly. Bullying can result in serious consequences. In fact, bullying not resolved at a younger age, can rear its ugly head throughout life, as you will see in my upcoming post.

In the meantime, if bullying is part of your child’s life, either as the bully or the bullied, Better Parenting University offers an eye opening parenting seminar packed full of helpful information and tactics to deal with bullying - including the anti bullying tactics my wife shared with our son.